Did you know that, in 75% of all break ups, the woman is the one who calls it quits? But as the old saying goes, it's a woman's prerogative to change her mind, and, sometimes within days of breaking it off, the woman changes her mind and wants to get back together with her ex boyfriend. But maybe she's embarrassed that she made a scene, and she doesn't say that she'd like to get back together with you.

So, if you want to get your ex girlfriend back, you'll have to make the first move.

First, you have to remind her what was good about being with you. Then, you have to let her know you're available, and that you want her back. And if there was a particular reason for the break up (whether she said it outright, or you can make a good guess), you have to address that.

For instance, let's say that when you first started going out, you used to take her to galleries and classical concerts because she's into that "artsy" stuff. Then, as your relationship got more settled, you were more likely to take her to a game, because you're more into sports.

After she breaks it off with you, maybe you realize that you haven't taken her to an "artsy" event in quite a while, and — even though she didn't mention it as a specific reason for the breakup — you guess that maybe that was something she'd been missing.

O.K. Don't run to the telephone just yet; give her some space, and a little time to cool down. Maybe after a couple weeks has gone by, casually mention that you have a couple of tickets to the symphony and ask whether she'd like to go as "just friends."

Chances are, she'll say yes. After the concert, take her to a romantic restaurant she likes and spring for a nice bottle of wine (if she likes wine, of course). Don't be surprised if she starts dropping hints that she wouldn't mind getting back together.

At this point, the ball will be in your court; be careful how you play it.

Tell her that you had a great time, and that you'd like to do it again very soon. But also tell her you hope that she'd be willing to go to a game with you sometime soon. Chances are she'll be in such a great mood that she'll agree. This way, there's a mutual understanding going forward, and everybody's happy.

When it happens, a breakup can feel like the worst thing that could possibly happen, but many times, it can be the best thing that could possibly happen. It can be the best thing if it leads to more open communications and a willingness to compromise, like in the made-up example I talked about here.

Because relationships are all about give and take.